”’Police work can be entertaining as well as dangerous. Recently, a female sheriff’s deputy arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22 year old white male, who was fornicating with a pumpkin in the middle of a field at night. The next day, at the Gwinnett County (GA) courthouse, Lawrence was charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency and public intoxication. The suspect explained that he was passing a pumpkin patch on his way home from a drinking session when he decided to stop.‘You know how a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around for miles, or at least I thought there was no one around’ he stated. Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purpose, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his pressing need.‘Guess I was really into it, y’know?’ he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process of doing the deed, Lawrence failed to notice an approaching sheriff’s. David parked at the rear of the building, next to the entrance that served employees and was next to the loading dock for cooler trucks leaving the plant.“Do I have to wear anything special, or anything when I go in?” Margaret asked.“Yes, I need to put an orange collar around your neck now, so you don’t get mistaken in case of an inspection. And I need your placement letter now, so we can put it and a copy of your identification into the files.”“Ok.”Margaret and David entered the “Employee Only” entrance at the rear and ducked into the loading office door. Once inside, looking inside of the dispatch office, there was a closet. On the top shelf was a box marked “Illinois State Meat Management Board”. Pulling down and opening the box, David showed Margaret the contents. Margaret eyed the orange-coated stainless steel collars with the locking ends. It looked like an old time bicycle lock, which used a round key. Putting it on, the collar was comfortable around her neck. It hung like a.
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